The surrender in the source of self-being is like a hydrogen bomb

Advaita Post, Volume 13 No. 21

From the bindu everything comes open

From the bindu everything comes open

[From the old days in the 70’s]

Dew drops are we,

reflections of a world.

Slowly we evaporate:

less and less world,

a steadily increasing unity.


I am a piece of stardust

blown into a little corner of the universe.

I am the unlimited,

the all-encompassing whole.


Positive sounds

Just a few more messages, for encouragement and inspiration. Just orient yourself to what each statement refers.

“It is clear

I am ‘That’,


“It’s weird, a kind of change in consciousness, a connection in myself, with mySelf.

A kind of silent infinity which makes it possible to view everything else from this background.

The beauty and happiness and love and that which is – aren’t just the effects of manifestations and events any longer.

But rather from the knowing and feeling and seeing that everything is connected by this still infinite presence.

That ungraspable which makes it possible to go beyond myself and all the rest.

I can stay there forever, I’m home there, and there, I can accept and let go. ”

“Now it’s so apparent, so clear … Duality doesn’t exist, only as thought.”


Text satsang

The ongoing spontaneous self meditation

 From an Advaita talk with Douwe Tiemersma ,Gouda, October 3, 2012

We have often spoken about the necessity of a continuous self meditation gradually arising on your spiritual path, an ongoing spontaneous focus on the essence of your own self-being. What would it mean if that were to happen? An ongoing self meditation. It must be clear then that self-realization was just going to happen.

In the satsangs we have spent years looking at various aspects of the advaita approach. Just take a look at what’s going on in your own situation. Just get that straight. Is that understandable? If so, then okay, we can proceed. That insight into your own situation and your own possibilities is extremely important. First more on the level of understanding than on the level of direct insight. But if it’s going to proceed to the total insight, what we call realization, everything you’ve previously seen on the level of understanding will disappear. That disappearance happens when you make the contents of your comprehending insight completely your own. This is done first of all on the level of the lower insight. In the deepening meditation there is a further making-your-own of that which you are able to understand there. It is an appropriation of the truth about what you are, and a coinciding with it.

When you take up this meditation, then it will also be clear: this will have to proceed, this meditation will have to become continuous. If not, then there’s always a distraction once again and then you’re back in duality. This meditation will have to go further than that of a discipline, because otherwise there’s too much of an ‘I’ busy with it who wants to control everything. The impulse will need to come from much deeper so that it can go spontaneously. Of course it’s like that. When you take up this meditation, you say: of course! It can‘t be otherwise. Then you’ll see how much else disappears in terms of importance. Even things of your spiritual path. In this ongoing meditation there is less and less of a little ‘I’ that meditates, a little ‘I’ that has considerations. That’s going to disappear. You’re going to find that the continuous meditation just happens in the great whole. Because the creating of borders disappears, the openness can grab its chance. That’s a very natural state of affairs. You will just have to let it happen, that prolongation of the meditation, with the continued disappearance of all ego-elements.

Once you experience that it’s spontaneous and that it continues, then there’s not a problem any more. On the one hand you have the experience that the meditation becomes increasingly focused. Focused on the essence of yourself, the essence of everything. There is an ever increasing concentration. So then there is the experience of a point in which the final ‘I’-element will disappear. While that continues, more and more limitations fall away from you, more and more veils disappear. This means that there is also another aspect to it, namely: that the sphere becomes increasingly open. And progressively it becomes increasingly clear: yes, there in that center, there every shape, every quality of myself will disappear, and that means that there is a total openness. The last veils are gone.

I refer to it in the hope that you can recognize it. So this meditation is very simple: it’s just this focus on the essence, on the core. And whatever else arises: don’t interfere with it. As soon as you have given attention to it, it becomes stronger and the meditation will stop. But you will just have to see what happens when you do go along with this meditation. The advaita path is direct. For that you have talks and thoughts about all aspects of non-duality and duality and of the path. Usually that’s also necessary. But at a certain point this path becomes direct. In this phase, here it’s about the continuous meditation. Within it you’ll get a direct sinking into the Origin. Without mediation. This core: you can experience it as the bindu of a mandala, the mandala of your life, with all kinds of sections and with various circles, of everything that occurs emotionally and mentally in life. In this movement towards the bindu you become aware of that which at first was unconscious.

With that everything is going to change. Your own self-being changes. All kinds of properties, all kinds of forms disappear. The worldly reality changes. Whatever is experienced then as reality, increasingly becomes a non-dual sphere, without separations. The separations between yourself and the world, even in the mental world, disappear. Through this all those things that belong to duality disappear, the feeling of loss, the experience of conflicts, desire, frustrations, suffering. They disappear! Because there is a wholeness, a completeness. Your being-awareness becomes more and more open and a great non-duality arises. That feeling of self is initially very clearly tied to the physical body, so in the movement, that develops itself further. In this development the body changes, too. It becomes increasingly subtle. And therefore too, increasingly expansive. That’s very concrete physically. All aspects of your own existence go along with it. On the level of insight it’s clear: oh yes, beautiful, this whole. On the feeling level, of the heart: it’s a feeling sphere of love without separations. On the level of the vital energies: it’s one great whole, a cosmic energetic body. On the level of the sexual energies: an entering into a total completeness, cosmic. The basis-earth-energy: it is infinite!

That’s how I have experienced it, that it’s a movement towards a point of an increasing concentration. Then you get a kind of atomic fusion as it were, through which your whole experienced reality is blown up like a hydrogen bomb. That’s the tantric approach: Shiva and Shakti come together there – in that very small subtle point. Wham! That immediately means that every center has disappeared. Is that recognizable?

Q: It’s certainly recognizable, but I do notice at the same time that a lot comes up about what doesn’t belong there. There’s a certain kind of cleansing process.

DT: Can you still let meditation continue?

Q: Sometimes it’s difficult. I do notice that I see more of it in my life, but when it gets heavy, I find it difficult.

DT: If just once you get into that stream of the continuing meditation, is there still a problem?

Q: No. That’s what’s interesting, because I’ve noticed that then when I lose it, there are problems. These problems aren’t there first. I do find that to be an eye-opener.

DT: Great. That’s a very important recognition. That’s why I ask you: when you just sit in that flow of this continuous meditation, are these problems there then?

Q: No, but sometimes it goes so fast, that something happens …

DT: When the meditation continues, are these problems there then?

Q: No, they aren’t there then.

DT: No! So now the only thing is to be in this state, while the meditation continues, to stay with a great clarity. And to confirm that: oh yes, this, this, this. Then your thinking about problems has no chance. Very simple. When the clarity decreases, the meditation becomes rigid, less strong and can stop. Yes, then all the problems return. But see where it comes from, from the diminishing of the current clarity. There has been a slacking off of the meditation and a distraction from everything that doesn’t belong to it. Of course, then it gets another chance.

Q: It frequently has a tremendous force.

DT: Yes but see, when you feel such tremendous force, it’s always something you’ve contributed to yourself.

Q: What do you mean?

DT: Just that this force isn’t just a natural phenomenon. That you make a contribution to it whenever it occurs. It doesn’t just come from externals, where you couldn’t do anything about it. No, it‘s a force with which you’ve already had some involvement. That force arises when you see all kinds of things as important. You can see this process, and that offers you the freedom, the opportunity to say to it: Oh no, I know how it works with my habits and emotions, but all that no longer matters if I continue with the central meditation. It continues when you stay there as much as possible, in that center and confirm: Oh, this, this, this, this, this; yes, this, this, this continues.

Q: Is it true that this internal meditation, as it becomes stronger, determines the path by itself?

DT: Yes, because the further course has nothing to do with an ‘I’, absolutely nothing. It really goes further in a completely natural way. You can understand this. When there are no forces that hold you down somewhere, that bind you to a duality, relaxation comes and the motion automatically turns back to its origin. That’s the natural state. It’s a natural state, so it goes by itself when you don’t contribute to it. The only thing is to keep your hands to yourself, so that your attachments don’t have a chance. So long as they have the tendency to be forceful you’ll have to pay attention quite carefully. Because then before you know it you’ll feel stuck again.


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